On her radio show today, Dr. Laura Schlessinger was laughing. On the topic of New York Governor Eliot Spitzer being caught using a high-priced hooker service, The Today Show had interviewed a call girl to ask why husbands go to prostitutes. Dr. Laura was thrilled to learn that this "whore" gave the same advice she had been giving. It was advice Dr. Laura says she has been relentlessly attacked on blogs for daring to give.
According to Dr. Laura, the call girl said that if a woman doesn't want her guy to go to a prostitute, she should "put more energy into the relationship". The theme of Dr. Laura's book, "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands", is that the modern women is neglecting her husband and may live to regret it.
Dr. Laura loves to give air time to anybody who antecdotally supports her book's thesis. Several times a week, she reads an email from a man who says he left his wife because she wasn't treating him like he had much value, and from a wife who says she regrets treating her husband like he was an afterthought, now that he has left.Dr. Laura was giddy throughout her show today.
Dr. Laura and the call girl may have part of the truth, but only part in my opinion. I think there are a multitude of reasons why men use prostitutes, not the least of which is that men have trouble with monogomy because they're not hard-wired for it.
I was once told by a guy who himself used prostitutes that guys go to hookers because hookers will do things their wives are not into, like S&M. I thought of him when the media spoke to one of the call girls at the service Spitzer was using and she revealed that the boss had told them that "Client 9", Spitzer, could expect them to do things that were not always "safe."
Judging from the Reuters photo above of Spitzer standing with his wife Silda Wall Spitzer, the onus is now on him to put some energy into the relationship.
UPDATE: On Friday morning, Sue Davis, who has worked as an escort/prostitute in Vancouver for 22 years, was interviewed on CFUN radio by Shannon Nelson. Davis said, "Men who are happily married and are exploring sex with their wives don't come to sex workers."
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Read about the ring of Vancouver professors who sought sex behind the backs of their spouses: Simon Fraser University Asked to Disclose Sexual Harassment Ring to Donors
4 comments:
I'm curious why you think (it is only your opinion, right?) that men are not hard-wired for monogamy?
I wouldn't rely on sensationalistic second-hand accounts. Did you actually see the video? The whole video? Did you watch and listen carefully? Dr. Laura was not excusing Spitzer, who is probably a malignant narcissist.
She was talking about "in general" - Dr. Laura says that ***IF*** you choose a GOOD man ***AND*** you treat him right, he will not stray. Nowhere does she excuse men for their decisions to commit adultery. However, she recognizes that if a wife isn't living by her marital vows (which are more than just "forsaking all others"), THEN a man is more likely not to live by his, either.
You don't have to like her or agree with her, but is it a good idea to spread false witness?
Ken,
You write, "I wouldn't rely on sensationalistic second-hand accounts."
Ken, your reading and comprehension skills are poor. There was nothing in my post to indicate that I had learned of Dr. Laura's comments second-hand. I thought it was clear that I had heard her radio show.
"Did you actually see the video? The whole video? Did you watch ...."
Again, Ken, you're demonstrating poor reading and comprehension skills. It is clear from the post that I had heard Dr. Laura's RADIO show, not a video.
"Nowhere does she excuse men for their decisions to commit adultery."
I didn't claim in my post that Dr. Laura excused men for adultery. You read that in, Ken. Dr. Laura made no mention in her segment on the call girl as to whether she excused men for adultery, so neither did I. The focus of the brief segment was on blaming wives so that's what I reported.
"You don't have to like her or agree with her, but is it a good idea to spread false witness?"
It is you, Ken, who is being sloppy with the facts, not me. My post is supported by the tape of Dr. Laura's radio show.
I've always thought that Dr. Laura's brand of psychiatry was like the political commentary of Ed Anger of Weekly World News fame.
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